From the Cheap Seats: Chinese Iced Tea

January 7, 2013

CHINA TEMP HITS 28 YR LOW:  China cannot be both the biggest emitter of greenhouse gases and an icebox. Can it?

While Coloradans are sweltering in subfreezing and frequent subzero temperatures  this winter, it’s colder than week-old take-out in China, cold enough that the shark fin in the soup is circling just to stay warm, so cold that the Gobi nomads are huddling together to preserve body heat.

Just how cold is it in the Middle Kingdom?  The mercury has dipped to the lowest average in 28 years. It’s so cold that 1,000 ships are trapped in coastal ice.

The China Meteorological Administration pegs the cold at an average of minus-3.8 degrees Celsius, 1.3 degrees colder than the previous average.

Even India has taken notice of the cold. The Times of India says the Kashmir Valley is ashiver in unusual cold and it’s not exactly shocking that the Kashmir in the north would be cold, but this spell is colder than usual.

How ever can this be?  China is now the world’s largest emitter of carbon dioxide, which, we’re constantly being lectured, is the most common of the greenhouse gases.

So how can it possibly be cold in China?

Really?  This is a Confucian nightmare.

China cannot be both the biggest emitter of greenhouse gases and an icebox. Can it?

Well, the boys at Pravda have a theory.

Stanislav Mishin writes in Pravda about “Global Warming, the tool of the West,” and says it’s all a ploy by the elites to preserve their status.

Elites, says Mishin, “moved to use this new ‘science’ to guilt-trip and scaremonger their populations into smaller and more conservative forms of living” and thus protect their own pre-eminent positions.

Cheap Seats doesn’t necessarily subscribe to Mishin’s entire line of reasoning – and we definitely don’t have a subscription to Pravda, but maybe the old boy is on to something.

For instance, you don’t get more elite than Sen. Mark Udall, his wife, Maggie Fox, who runs the Climate Reality Project (CRaP) for a paltry $250 large a year and Al Gore, the former veep who just sold his highly overvalued Current TV for some serious petrodollars (you remember, Al doesn’t like petroleum, right?) and at significant cost to the treasury by closing before Jan. 1.

A peon would have been called unpatriotic, but not Al and not Maggie and you know there will be no Senate investigation.  You could bet all the iced tea in China on it.

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